“entire sweating restless world”

Excerpt(s) from Chapter 9 of the upcoming LONELYHEARTS 2016:

The door was unlocked. Judging from the smell, it’d been left unlocked for a drug-dealer or two. A pungent mixture saturated the air and devoured me as I crept within; entranced. It was like I was floating on his sweat-glands, swimming through his bladder. Climbing his swollen, throbbing intestines. My lips parted so I could taste the flatulent agony, the stagnant waste and recycled air that I recognized from my own life: he hadn’t left his room in days, maybe even weeks.

(. . .)

I’d never felt closer to him, entangled there with his un-showered body. Under sodden, warmly chilling sheets, with crumbs of god-knows-what sticking to my skin. I became possessed with an overwhelming need to lick him clean, to grind my tongue across every pore, valley and bulge of his flesh until I cleansed him of his depression. I would take him into my mouth and hold him inside, bathing him there forever if I had to, if it meant I could lick and suck all his stains away: the lifetime of stains left by selfish parents, thoughtless friends, uncaring strangers, unexamined pain and unexpressed passion. I smelled myself in his unrepentant sloth. Saw myself in his dewy-jungle armpit. Tasted myself in his salty sadness. Heard myself in his near-but-faraway heartbeat. Felt myself in his struggling to be held. He was me, born into a different body. I was in bed with the entire sweating restless world.


Love always,

real cover

tentative cover

Miss L.

Open your heart to me?

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